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You have got to be kidding me!

In yesterday’s episode of ‘As the Dingo Chews’ I took you through exciting world of blog contests (and just what can happen if you win one). I also got pretty clever and made a contest of my own that was impossible to win (more on that later). There were some pretty good answers so rather than you having to go back and read them for yourselves, I’ll summarise them here for you.

Robin:
It’s a tooth from the dog in Tiff’s original picture.  And a coin with the number 5 on it.
Oh so close, but no cigar. Plus you were disqualified for not all reading the post carefully.
But then you thought about it some more.
Or maybe a jackalope or unicorn tooth….
Yep, that will win you a prize for sure, if that won’t do it, maybe some bribery..
Which reminds me…I have some other stuff I’m supposed to be sending to bluddies…

Laurie:
how do i get into this secret club of presents mailed from afar???
ok so my answers are imprecise and probably wrong. send me some stuff anyway!

Screw the contest, just send me something, anything!

Katie:

I vote for bear claw…. 🙂

Cool prize…. and interesting coin….
Ah yeah, about that…I put the coin there to show scale, too bad no-one knew how big the coin was.

Swampy:
I like the coin. Is that a kiwi? I know, the Kiwi is a small flightless
bird from NZ. Regardless, it’s cute. Wow ! ELEVEN dollars. Next time,
have her just send $$$.

Another ‘fuck the contest’ entry, let’s discuss the Kiwi and the cost of postage. (there are no kiwis in OZ, except for Bondi)

Tiggerlane:
I just laughed my butt off until tears streamed down my face.
 
Man that sounds painful, I would have like to have seen a picture of that! Not everyday you see a buttless woman with streaky cheeks.

Reevesfarm:
I will be happy to send you some for future anger management.
She is offering to send me her kids toys to break, now that’s some kinda mom.

Jenni in KS:

Is that an echidna on the coin?  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Echidna
Bingo! Yes it is Jenni. But what you really deserve a prize for is posting a comment that was actually shorter than the post itself!

Pamela:
I don’t have my glasses on  – and I’M LATE for work as usual.

Seems to me I’ve heard this excuse before.

Pamela:
I don’t have my glasses on  – and I’M LATE for work as usual.

Now I know I’ve definitely heard this one before!

Pamela:


awww..i found my glasses. that is  shrew money if I ever saw it. and its a sabre tiger tooth.
You were doing better without your glasses.

Mary:
Dog tooth. Wierd.

Yes, and yes. But sadly I can’t give you the prize, because while you got the dog tooth right, you spelled weird wrong (and I said it had to be exact)

Mark:

Clearly an elephant tusk – pure ivory, shrunk by Rick Moranis to look
just like a canine canine – not a typo, but both meanings: dog and
tooth between incisor and premolars of a mammal.

Surprisingly close, well except for the ivory and being shrunk by Rick Moranis. And yes, I did know that it wasn’t a typo.

Mrs Tiggerlane:
Very strange that so few noticed #1 – the coin is NOT part of the gift!
It’s WILLOW’S COIN! I’m not THAT generous!! (Well, actually, if you
guys were guessing correctly, you would understand how generous I
really am…)

Thank you Tiff for pointing that out, seemed pretty straightforward to me, but it obviously wasn’t.

Wolfbaby:


dinasore tooth.. ohhhh

or dinasore claw
that she dug up in a whatcha call it… ya know those dig thingys;)

Good ol’ Wolfie (I just love it when you talk technical), you always give it your best shot, it’s a shame you’re usually firing blanks.

MJD:
This is a very interesting prize and phenomenal presentation and
dialogue about the prize. I will pass on guessing about the prize; I do
not need some old broken cat’s canine tooth. Thanks any ways.

No tooth for you!! (said the tooth nazi)

Claudia x 3:
But where did the tooth come from?  Please don’t tell me it’s from the dog!

Ok, I won’t tell you that. And thanks for bumping my comment count.

Robin:
I forgot to mention earlier that Tiggerlane has beautiful handwriting and a smokin’ signature…she’s destined for stardom.

Back off sister! That tooth is mine!

Christene:
A dingo canine? A shiba inu canine? (Speaking of which, is that really
a dingo in your … er… blog button?… er… picture?… And by the
way, does my Shiba Inu look like a dingo or does your Barbie eating
dingo look like my Shiba?

Hello Christene and welcome. The colouring is similar, and some of the conformation, but dingoes don’t have the thick fur of the Shiba Inu or a curly tail, plus they don’t come from Japan and they were around  before both the Akita and the Shibu Ina (so I guess yours looks like mine). And yes, that really is a dingo in my picture, and yes, it does have my Barbie.

Gawilli:
Is this a puppy tooth from Poo Woo?

What the fuck!? There’s something fishy going on here! There’s no way that exact combination of words could be in the same sentence without some kind of cheating!!! I figured that someone would guess that it was a dog tooth, but I wasn’t worried because no-one would say that it was a puppy tooth, nor would they actually say Poo Woo’s name (all of which I required for a correct answer!)

So Congratulations Gawilli, and if you want some crap sent to you, send me your address.

 
 
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32 Responses

  1. There was NO cheating on my part – and no one, not even my family, knows what I sent. The Offspring might be mightily pissed.

    And Gawilli? Damn…I’m impressed. Except, gotta give Mark a little credit for identifying it as the canine from a canine. But Gawilli nailed it – a puppy tooth!!

    I have three of my wisdom teeth (GNARLY) saved – think that would make a good prize?

  2. see.. i had to be original.. and words were just escaping me as usual.. ahh well;)

    now that you know how my brain works can you please do a contest I might actually win?

    ROLF

  3. anything to bump up your comment count!! I kept hitting submit because it kept telling me that there was an error!! after 3 attempts, I’d had just about enough! that’s my story and I’m sticking to it!!

  4. Hey ! Hey ! Hey !…I did TOO mention the prize. If you’ll go back and carefully read my comment, I said, “Maybe her name is Tigerlane and it’s one of her incisors.” So, there. And I did clarify that I knew the Kiwi was in NZ…not the land of OZ. So, there !

  5. Hey ! Hey ! Hey !…I did TOO mention the prize. If you’ll go back and carefully read my comment, I said, “Maybe her name is Tigerlane and it’s one of her incisors.” So, there. And I did clarify that I knew the Kiwi was in NZ…not the land of OZ. So, there !

  6. Tiff – Wow, they’d make great prizes. It’s such a damn shame that I’ll be busy for all those contests.

    Wolfie – I’ll see what I can do.

    Claudia – It’s been happening to me too (and everyone else, I suspect, too)

    Swampy – Yes I know you did, but if you go back and carefully read all the other comments, you’ll see that most have been edited. The problem is, my readers have short attentions spans and that’s a lot of info to process, plus if I included all that, you’d have nothing to rag on me about.

  7. I do poo woo poo in your contests.
    and I DID NOT POST MY ANSWER TWICE.
    I’m blaming that one on type pad. I’d know if I passed word verification.

  8. I’m still stuck on you listing 666 as your address.

    Tiggerlane, I love your writing 🙂

  9. I’m still stuck on you listing 666 as your address.

    Tiggerlane, I love your writing 🙂

  10. I missed the guessing game but reading everyone’s answers is fun; talking of teeth am I WEIRD because I’ve kept my girls milk teeth and beccy’s wisdom teeth????

  11. Love the comments! *LOL*

  12. Pamela – Yeah sure (kidding), it’s happened to me a few times lately too.

    Kila – I’m glad you picked that up.

    ChrisB – That would be an affirmative there Chris.

    Debbie – So do I, the comments are the best part of my blog.

  13. Pamela – Yeah sure (kidding), it’s happened to me a few times lately too.

    Kila – I’m glad you picked that up.

    ChrisB – That would be an affirmative there Chris.

    Debbie – So do I, the comments are the best part of my blog.

  14. i will be haunting the mailbox, waiting for my prize.

    i’m new to this blog so i had no idea who poo poo was. or whatever. so maybe the prize should be some kind of welcome-wagon thing.

  15. For the record, I’d like to note I’m your YOUNGER sister.

    Glad that’s out in the open. I bet no one woulda guessed til you spilled the beans.

  16. For the record, I’d like to note I’m your YOUNGER sister.

    Glad that’s out in the open. I bet no one woulda guessed til you spilled the beans.

  17. I won a prize? Oh, wait, it says I “deserve” a prize. I guess that means I don’t actually *get* a prize. I’m going back to long-ass comments.

    Why do people use “ass” at the end of adjectives to emphasize them? Do they do that there or is it some weird phenomenon among the kids that are constantly hanging out at my house and on MySpace? It makes me laugh. You know, picturing a long ass or whatever ass.

    While I’m on the subject of the word ass and its usage in everyday speech, what exactly does the term “asshat” mean? Is that a common expression there? Or is it some weird Canadian concoction? I’d personally never heard it before until I started reading this blog: http://theredneckmommy.com/
    She’s funny as hell. (That’s another interesting word combination. How funny is hell? Is hell really funny at all?) She uses the word “asshat” on a daily basis it seems.

    Oh wow. I think I need to nominate you for another Thinking Blogger Award. See how much your blog makes me think? Quality of thought doesn’t matter, does it?

  18. OK, just wanted to keep you straight that I did too mention what was in the package…and that I was partially correct with incisor…just wasn’t a tiger incisor.

    There once was a blogger named Tigger(lane)
    Who found an object much like an incisor
    Her friend across the sea
    Whose name is DubYaT
    Sent the tooth as a gift from the blogger.

  19. ha ha ha … this was too much fun – reading the comments! 🙂

    I have had bear claws.. they were actually bigger – and they did not have the yellower broken end like this tooth. However, I’m in the middle of mucking out – I have way too much stuff so I dinna want more. Not that I knew it was from Poo Woo. So really I had nothing to be afraid of… lol… but.. still….

    As far as cookies go Willowtree – we have chocolate chip cookies and macadamian cookies here. Yeah, I know that’s probably not how you spell the nuts from Hawaii … but who really cares? 🙂

    We are up to 5 dogs/puppies here… Binkie , Bandera, Bella, Biscuit and the latest stray… Cristiana – almost as big as a horse and eats like one!!!( Chrissy … aren’t you gone yet??!!!) And mud… we are up to our asses in mud ( I believe I read ass was the word of the day in a comment earlier.. )

    I laughed at the 666 because of my long ass answer to my questionnaire I had to fill out about jury duty. Not that I would mind jury duty, mind you. Simply that I felt I needed to be clear and precise on my questions.They asked me” What do you think about Religion? ” Such a broad and generic dumb ass question!

    I know how much you enjoy this long ass posts Peter. I’m sure you know that it does not come natural to me to be so chatty… only for you!:)

  20. ha ha ha … this was too much fun – reading the comments! 🙂

    I have had bear claws.. they were actually bigger – and they did not have the yellower broken end like this tooth. However, I’m in the middle of mucking out – I have way too much stuff so I dinna want more. Not that I knew it was from Poo Woo. So really I had nothing to be afraid of… lol… but.. still….

    As far as cookies go Willowtree – we have chocolate chip cookies and macadamian cookies here. Yeah, I know that’s probably not how you spell the nuts from Hawaii … but who really cares? 🙂

    We are up to 5 dogs/puppies here… Binkie , Bandera, Bella, Biscuit and the latest stray… Cristiana – almost as big as a horse and eats like one!!!( Chrissy … aren’t you gone yet??!!!) And mud… we are up to our asses in mud ( I believe I read ass was the word of the day in a comment earlier.. )

    I laughed at the 666 because of my long ass answer to my questionnaire I had to fill out about jury duty. Not that I would mind jury duty, mind you. Simply that I felt I needed to be clear and precise on my questions.They asked me” What do you think about Religion? ” Such a broad and generic dumb ass question!

    I know how much you enjoy this long ass posts Peter. I’m sure you know that it does not come natural to me to be so chatty… only for you!:)

  21. Tiggerlane, thanks for giving me a little credit. WT, why was my answer “surprisingly close?” Didn’t expect a lawyer type to know about dog teeth? In law school I learned that every dog gets one bite and therefore I have every reason to know all about dog teeth.

  22. Hey Wt don’t tell the man about me shooting blanks please.. don’t want to tip him off;P

  23. Unbelieveable!!!

  24. That was insane!

  25. That was insane!

  26. Nice use of tooth nazi.

  27. Yahoo! I’m e-mailing my address straightaway and will be patiently waiting for my prize to arrive. The actual size of the coin tipped me off. No cheating here!

  28. MAR(k)NIE ?
    H-m-m-m !

  29. Dear willowtree. I’m back! and I’m… confused. Is it a minature yeti tooth?

  30. What the …

    Okay, Gawilli must be psychic (and why you’re using your astounding abilities on this crap is beyond me).

    And what up….MAR(K)NIE??!!!

  31. What the …

    Okay, Gawilli must be psychic (and why you’re using your astounding abilities on this crap is beyond me).

    And what up….MAR(K)NIE??!!!

  32. Crap. I missed it all.

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