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Another close shave.

It appears to me, that according to my dwindling comment numbers, I’m on a slippery slide into obscurity. While I don’t obsess over how many sick perverted people loyal friends are reading the Dingo, I can’t help but wonder what I’m doing wrong. And then it hit me like a concrete truck!! For some reason, reading the Dingo is viewed by many as a bloodsport, and frankly there hasn’t been enough blood lately.

So for all of you who derive schadefreude-like pleasure from my misfortunes, here’s the story of the time I actually did get hit by a concrete truck…

It was around 1974, when I naively accepted a job in the middle of nowhere. I say naively, because at the tender age of twenty, I chose to go live and work at a place eight hours drive from home, that I’d never even heard of before, and take charge of a crew of twelve electricians and labours working on the installation of the equipment used in the operation of a newly constructed abattoir, plus of course all the light power for the buildings themselves.

This may not have been so hard if it wasn’t for that one small detail they failed to mention…the guy who had been in charge for the past year was still there and thought he was still in charge, which led to some uncomfortable moments. But being young and stupid, I eventually prevailed. Plus, I was fully qualified and he wasn’t, so there was no way he could have gotten the installation signed off anyway.

Oh, I forgot to mention, initially I didn’t have a car as I’d just returned from New Zealand where I’d been for six months or so (now that’s a story of misadventure for another time!), but eventually I bought a ’62 EJ Holden Station Wagon that had a good body but a crook engine…


and a ’60 FB Sedan with a good engine but a crook body…


and then swapped the engines all by myself and ended up with a car that had a crook body and a crook engine.

The whole process was pretty interesting; I borrowed a block and tackle and fixed it to a beam under the slaughter floor, undid all the mounting bolts and any crap attached to the motor of the EJ, then just pulled it out of the housing leaving me with a good body but no engine in the EJ. Next I did the same thing to the FB leaving me with a good engine hanging from the block and tackle, I then pushed the FB out of the way and pushed the EJ under the motor which was still hanging from the beam. Then I just lowered it into the EJ and hooked everything back up and presto! The only thing that threw me was that the clutches were different, the EJ was hydraulic while the FB was mechanical/hydraulic which meant I had to reroute the hydraulic line. Now that I see it written down for the first time, I can’t believe I actually did it, knowing as little as I do about cars!

Hmm, I have a feelling that last paragraph will have some of you scratching your heads and saying "WTF?", and frankly I don’t blame you, after all I’m not only the one who wrote it, but I’m also the one who actually did it, and I am totally fucking confused! So here’s the Cliff notes…Bought two cars, took the good engine out of one and put it in the other one.

Gosh look at the time! I guess you’ll have to come back later to find out if I survived the crash…

(I didn’t plan on making this a cliff-hanger, I just got sidetracked when I started writing about it, one of these days I’ll outline a post before I write it)


37 Responses

  1. Yeah, I don’t think you survived. Nope. Sure didn’t.

  2. I’m thinking you made it through the whole ordeal, but were somehow terribly brain damaged.

  3. Oh,kaycie. When you’ve got it, you’ve GOT IT. Heh.

    And peter, seriously. How many comments does it take to satisfy you? I thought you weren’t a middle child…

  4. RC – That’s right, I’m not the middle child, I’m the youngest child…that’s the “look at me, look at me” child. I’m not asking for support, I just want attention.

  5. [Pours a vat of custard over his head] Now THERE’S some attention for ya! [laffs maniacally]

    ahhh… the joys of trying to live and work out in the middle of nowhere. good on ya! Tis amazing to look back and realise how much silly stuff we actually survived thru, huh? lol

    Mal 🙂

  6. “newly constructed abattoir”…that’s a phrase you don’t read much any more.
    No wonder there’s no spam in this website…lol.

  7. You were tragically killed, but they managed to sew your head onto the body of a robot and you’ve fooled us all ever since?


    you used to be good for two or three, correcting my spelling, picking my syntax apart and lamenting my lack of capital letters.

    my brother used to cannibalize cars, too. but once he cannibalized a car that didn’t technically belong to him. that experience didn’t turn out too well…

  9. I’ll admit it. I was pretty confused until the cliff notes, but now it’s all clear. And then you stop!

  10. I was actually following along, the one time I didn’t require the cliff notes!
    I wanted to comment on the previous post but had nothing to say. Next time I’ll make sure I type something.

    I thought the middle child was the one typically ignored/forgotten and screamed “look at me” the most. Everyone pays attention to the baby of the family…guess I’m wrong.

    I am still really happy that you are writing posts. Even fence fixing keeping score posts!

  11. Love the 1960s illustrations! I sort of got it but the cliff notes were necessary clarity. If you do start obsessing over numbers at any point, just let us know and we’ll each comment twice. I can always think of meaningless things to say. Like now, for instance.

  12. Sorry willowtree, the only reason I haven’t been commenting on your blog is because I’m too busy watching Hallmark channel and blowing my nose. If you can offer viable alternatives to those activities, then I’m all for ya.

  13. Comment whore!

  14. Well I don’t comment, but I lurk a lot. I love your animals, too. Happy now?

  15. OK we got the gist of this…

  16. …..BTW how many comments are you aiming for…..

  17. …..your fans are always ready to oblige…….!!!!

  18. I laughed.
    There. I’ve commented.

    Now. Back to teenager-who-thinks-she-knows-it-all.

    Thanks for the mini-break;). I needed it.

  19. Ooh, too bad the sedan was the one with the screwed up body. It would’ve been pertier than the station wagon.

    I have to go look up “abattoir” now. Well, after I play the trivia game. Trivia and vocabulary! This blog is just so darned educational.

  20. I do not know the reason for dwindling comments, but I do not think that most are here for Schadenfreude. I read your blog for a variety of reasons, for your special brand of sarcastic humor, for the revealing details of your extensive experience, for the cute pet pictures and stories, for the camaraderie among the commenters, and for the good time.

    I have only read the introduction to your story so I will be back to read the exciting details of WT and cement truck.

  21. See Molly said it best! I am here for all the same reasons she said. I am NOT here for Schadenfreude.

  22. Well WT…I don’t think you survived without a bit of brain damage, but I will be back to see what happened!! I miss your visits on my site and your comments…you always gave me a dose of reality!! Where have you been??

  23. ..Oh, I forgot….I use paragraphs now!!!

  24. “Look at me, look at me.” I am the youngest child too and I used to grab my mom’s face and say this.

  25. Now, I have read the rest of the post.You were in charge of a crew installing equipment at a slaughterhouse?

    Thanks for the Cliff Notes version, and I await the cliff-hanging continuation.

  26. Well here’s a comment from me to swell your numbers. Bummer really when your fan base starts to shrink. Before you know it people will be saying ‘didn’t you used to be erm , umm, you know, the guy that used to post witty stuff on his dingo website? Jeeze I thought you were dead’! So, I agree with some other poster up above who said something along the lines of – ‘you used to comment on my posts regularly and now you don’t (sic), Y’see you have to get off your arse and make comments – we are vain and needy bunch of bloggers who crave feedback in any shape or form! Welcome to the club oh master blogger – we are not worthy! Yer lucky, some people just read blogs and bugger off without a bye or leave! Cheeky swines.

  27. I too am a middle child therefore I understand!!

  28. MOB – Thankyou you for taking the time and effort to give me some blogging guidance. I’m thrilled that you used your second ever comment here to enlighten me with “Y’see you have to get off your arse and make comments…” 😉

    I was once known for my prolific commenting, but since xmas I’ve cut back somewhat. I did used to comment on your blog regularly, but you seemed to stop posting, so after a while I stopped checking. My sage advice is that in the blogworld it’s “post or perish”. That and leave your URL with your comment if you want people to find you.

    Oh, and without being too picky, I think its without a by-your-leave. However, it seems that the Scots say bye or leave from time to time.

    And while I’m at it…(sic), normally written [sic] is used to indicate that a transcription is written “as is”, and for the life of me I can’t find that quote in any of the comments for this post. However, it is sometimes used to indicate irony, as may be the case here.

  29. Jenni – I agree, the FB is a much better looking car.

    Laurie – I think you’ll find I’m still pretty regular, although I did lay low for a bit after I pissed you off with a misunderstood comment (and occupational hazard when you have my sense of humour).

    Molly – Thankyou, you and Sandy are among the few who seemed to read past the first paragraph.

  30. Car talk – over my head.

  31. Speaking of 74 and station wagons, that was the year I naively took my first job, still in high school and having had my driver’s license only 2 or 3 months – and it included making deliveries of newspapers in my boss’s station wagon.

    My mom didn’t own a station wagon, so naturally I’d never driven one. I soon learned that the added length is something you really need to think about when rounding corners…

  32. are you the one with the roses in the pic, wt?

  33. Oh dear, I guess I offended you with yesterdays comment as you have deleted it. It was meant in jest…maybe my sense of humour is a bit off the wall, which is why I’m usually stuck for some witty comment!

  34. By the way, I always read the whole post but sometimes find it hard to know what to comment yet want to acknowledge that I have read the post.

    I think I could probably win the most boring commenter award!

  35. Beccy – I don’t delete comments unless they are spam. TypePad was playing up yesterday, I know becasue I lost a couple of my comments too.

    Your humour is a bit off the wall!? Did you see the last comment I left on your blog??

  36. The post had a lot of white noise…the comments? Sarcasm supreme…

    off to continue catching up….

  37. No one ever comments on my blog. Fortunately, I write to amuse myself and I know that I am a genius and when I am dead and gone, my work will suddenly be viewed as the biting, satiric commentary on the daily life of the average American woman that it is!!

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