We all mourn the lost of certain things, for example I mourn the loss of some of my beloved hair , the ability to party all night, and patience with children. I mourn the loss of good, well written television (despite the current writers’ misguided belief that they are indispensable). I mourn the loss of my love of travel, the thrill that I got getting my gear together and putting on my travelling clothes, the excitement I got waiting at airports and train stations.
I mourn the world’s general loss of innocence, humanity’s seeming loss of respect for others and world leaders’ loss of their grip on reality (ok, that one is really just Dubya). I mourn the loss of well made, easy to fix cars, being able to find a seat on a train, being able to find a seat on a train without some asswipe with an iPod who thinks I’ll like their music as much as they do, being able to find a seat anywhere without having to deal with some ignorant, lowlife piece of shit with a mobile phone who thinks I’m interested in hearing their conversation.
I mourn the loss of my ability to deal with life’s little annoyances without going ballistic. I mourn the loss of not being able to sit down anywhere in my own house without having to move an animal first (I know I could fix that, but I also mourn my loss of motivation).
But most of all, I mourn the loss of Diners, those funny looking, almost extinct American institutions, I’ve been lucky enough to eat in a few of them, and it’s always a great experience. While it’s convenient to say that it’s simply and evolutionary thing, and we must move with the times, I lay the blame firmly at the base of the golden arches, and our willingness to accept reconstituted dog shit as food instead of insisting on quality. Are we all such impatient, cheap bastards that we can wait for our food to be cooked and then pay a fair price for it?
Anyway, what’s the point? Well funny I should ask, the point is that I stumbled upon a clip I enjoyed the other day. In fact, I enjoyed it so much I’d like to share it with you, it’s a tribute to Diners. I hope you like it too…
The song may be familiar to you, it’s by Martin Sexton and originally came to notice in a Scrubs compilation scene. It you’d prefer that instead, it’s here.
PS. I wouldn’t mourn the loss of a few kilos.
Updated** Here’s the lyrics in case you’re interested…
You might have seen one out in Minnesota
Or maybe down by the sea in Sarasota
But they were made back in Worcester Mass
Of aluminum and Bakelite and glass
Like a locomotive they were streamlines
And the blue prints were drawn up from a dream of mine
Slap ’em up put ’em on the train
Out to Michigan up to Maine
You may find a diner down in Georgia or
Carolina off the twenty by the Piggly Wiggly
In the country out of Waynesboro
Or when it’s getting late and rainy out in New York State
You hang a louie off the thru-way
And you go and grab yourself a cheeseburger
At the little gem diner off the six niner
Diner my shiny shiny love
In the night you’re all I’m thinking of
Diner my shiny shiny love
The cruiser pulls in where the trooper’s always stop
As we dine over the chrome and formica table top
The cashier she always squints
By the gum and the bowl of mints
She’s tapping her toe
To the Dean Martin on the consolette
Booth service and a cigarette we’re loving it so
Side of fries a dollar
Or the haddock plate two ninety five
A rootbeer float a pepsi
And be sure to save some room for some apple pie
Better make it a-la-mode
Dean Martin god rest his soul
Talkin’ to me from the cereal bowl
There’s a couple from the show me state
Knockin’ back a little meatloaf plate
Diner my shiny shiny love.
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