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The trip to the Coast.

Ok, I’ve stalled as long as is humanly possible so I should just bite the bullet and write the dam post. Although in truth I really don’t see how biting a bullet will help, I would have thought turning the computer on would be more advantageous.

Anyway, it all started late in the afternoon of the 23rd of August 1954. My mother, who always was a little on the largish side (we liked to call it big boned) was unusually large at this particular point in time. Not only that, she seemed to be in some mild discomfort, due to a ‘soon to be person‘ thinking it was about time he joined society. And so it was that early in the morning of the 24th of Aug, I was ejected from my womb with a view, in much the same manner that a pop-tart leaves the toaster. Not wanting to be a nuisance, I just slide right out of there (I’ve always been very considerate like that).

Skipping forward a few short years and you find the ol’ WT entering the prime of his life and looking forward to travelling to the coast to pick up his booty romance his wife. I got there on Friday arvo without incident, except for the huge crash that saw me stuck in gridlock for about 30 minutes (5 minutes from my destination!) still I can’t complain, judging by the total destruction of three cars involved, there were people having a worse time than me.

MDW had already bought me a nifty new phone that just about does it all, and I love it! But she also offered to buy me a camera. However knowing what a prick I am, she wouldn’t do it unless I made the final decision on which one, while actually standing in the store with her! She’s a clever one that MDW, experience has taught her well. Having reading a heap of reviews prior to going to the Coast, I ultimately decided on this baby. Even though I haven’t really done much with it yet, I know we’ll be really happy together, oh and speaking of which, I’d like to congratulate my good friends Dirty Aunt Marnie and Dirty Uncle Mark on the their recent betrothal. I suppose I’ll eventually forgive Marnie for breaking off our engagement, and throwing our wedding plans into disarray, to be with that refugee from Daktoka.

Anyway back to me, I’m the interesting one (something that Marnie will eventually come to realise after spending time with her gay lawyer). I learned some neat new lingo while I was on the Coast, I’m really hip now. Before I even went to the Coast, I downloaded all the groovy software available for my phone, but as expected, there was no data cable in the box. After much searching we finally found one, but the hip young dude in the shop, mediately recognised me as the ‘with it wannabe’ I really am, and said “yeah, you can get the data cable, but for only $10 more you can get a bluetooth dongle”.

Mmmmm d-o-n-g-l-e, I has to have one! He said “these are really simple, and if you change phones you don’t need to get another cable”, which I later discovered to mean “you wait until you try to get this fucking thing working you stupid old fart, that’ll teach you to try to act cool”. But hey, I’m down with it, and it only took me most of yesterday to realise I really am a stupid old fart. Oh well, I don’t need no stinking software!

**Brief update: One of the cats (Beau) was pleased to see me when I got back and cuddled all afternoon, the other two didn’t show up until around midnight, then they just ate a pissed off again.


51 Responses

  1. /me loves dongles.
    Don’t understand why… but I’m not questioning it.

  2. Oh WT what would I do without you to brighten my day.

    The camera looks really snazzy and I’m sure you’ll be wowing us with lots of amazing photos before too long.

    P.S. had no one told you you’re a stupid old fart before?

  3. Ha I though you were always trying to tell me I was a stupid old f**T or was it a goldfish!!

    Camera looks great and I take it you will be able to plurk from the phone!

  4. Bluetooth dongle, can I have your old rubber one, if your not going to use it anymore?. Happy Birthday (again) you old Cahn!

  5. A dongle? That sounds sorta… dirty, don’t it?

    I have camera-envy. Chartreuse with it, in fact. May have actually drooled when reading specs. You lucky bastard. Take pictures, show us. And then please whine about how you hate the new camera so I won’t snap and go shopping for one for myself. Thanks much!

  6. Great looking camera. I hope you love it. Glad to see you back. I hope your cats get happy again. Whistler looks like a fantastic place to visit. Mountain air and pines. Mmmm….

  7. Dongle does sound a bit dirty. It also reminds me of a little military ditty I once heard, which also sounds dirty. I’m thinking the first dangle in each line below could easily be changed to dongle.

    Don’t let your dingle dangle dangle in the dirt
    Pick up your dingle dangle put it in your shirt
    Dont let your dingle dangle dangle in the mud
    Pick up your dingle dangle hand it to your bud
    Dont let your dingle dangle dangle in the snow
    Pick up your dingle dangle tie it in a bow
    Dont let your dingle dangle to low
    Pick up your dingle dangle and lets go

    Anyway…glad you had a good booty call, er, I mean birthday trip.

  8. Well the new loot should keep you occupied for a little while anyway. The camera really does look nice. What a lucky boy…I mean old fart.

  9. Glad to hear you are finally admitting that you ARE an old fart!
    The new camera looks awesome! Can’t wait to see your photos from it. Happy that you had such a fantastic weekend!

  10. So what sort of phone did you get? Was it an i-phone? And now what I really want to know is did you get YDW’s car cleaned before you went home? Or were you just hoping she would not notice the smell?

  11. Dude, you can’t put a link in there to a photo review site and expect me not to get distracted!! Happy late birthday, you old fart!

  12. So? what kind of phone is it? Can you plurk with it?

  13. I’m setting up a fund to support Daktokan Refugees. Any interested parties can send money directly to me for the time being. It will be used to directly benefit me, myself and I.

    I know that seems selfish but he did actually bring the leisure suit to Canada this trip…

  14. New toys!!! Maybe they’ll distract you from plurking for 30 seconds or so. Glad you had a good birthday!!!

  15. Congrats on the new stuff. Wow us with pictures of all the animal kids :-). Did I miss your birthday? Happy Birthday!!!

  16. How nice of YDW, she’s a nice lady!! Luvly camera, you’re going to have fun.
    Speaking of fun, Richard has a dongle, it’s great!

    And congrats to the newly betrothed, I think we should now call them Markie, in manner of Brangelina or TomKat. All those in favour say “aye-yaye-aye” …

  17. Good idea, Melissa, but how about Marnk? in honor of the Canadian goose, you know? Marnk – marnk!

    Glad your trip was good, WT, and even if you didn’t get booty, you sure brought home some booty!

  18. Show us your dongle WT.

  19. Sandy, I snorted cereal milk through my nose! Definitely! (Marnk – marnk) …

  20. LMAO! @ “womb with a view” and “Dirty Aunt Marnie” (that’s just perfect!).

    Ugh. They’re not really going to use the word “dongle” for tecnhology now are they?

  21. Wow, a snazzy phone AND camera. OH – and those blue tooth doohickies? Dave has tried and tried again to use them and they keep acting up.

    I’m glad you had a good birthday!

  22. beccy – No, actually most people are fairly polite.

    Chris – I can plurk from the phone but I won’t, or rather I don’t need to, I never go anywhere.

    Paul – Consider it yours.

    Lene – Sadly, I doubt there will be a rant, so far it’s been a dream camera.

    Junebug – Whistler is just for unstable canucks and gay lawyers, you’d never get me there.

    Jenni – We used to sing that at school, slightly different words, but basically the same thing.

    Mary – Fuck you, I mean thanks very much. 😉

    Kaytabug – Please refer to above.

    Karisma – No, it’s just the cheapie, but I like it. And no, I just left the windows open.

    Claudia – That’s a good site, it does thorough reviews and good comparisons. I used it a lot to choose the last camera I got 4 years ago.

    Beckie – Yes I can. It’s a Nokia 6085, nothing special.

    Marknie – Photos?

    Equoni – I doubt it, I only have a 30 second attention span.

    Annie – You missed my birthday? that’s harsh!

    MelissaNZ – We’ve been calling them Mar(k)nie for a while now.

    Sandy – that would be appropriate since the Canadian is marrying and American goose.

    Jo – I’ll need you private email….

    Melissa – You need to clean that up.

    Shades – Actually they’ve use ‘dongle’ for ages, they used to be popular anti piracy devices in the early 90s.

  23. Rats! And there I thought I was being all sharp and clever and witty! 😉

  24. Wow, enjoy your new toys (the phone and camera, that is)!

    I’m glad you’re here to keep us hip.

    Dongle sounds like a naughty word. No wonder you like it.

    Hey, guess what? My third boy also started labor on the 23rd and was born early on the 24th. May instead of August, but still…

  25. P.S. Your last sentence seems to be missing a word, and I’ve been having fun trying to fill in the blank.

    “then they just ate a pissed off _____ again.”

  26. I also replied to your comment on my post. Thanks. 😀

  27. I had to come out of lurkdom to comment, I too was born in the early morning hours of August 24th…. only in 1974.
    And thanks for the lesson on what a dongle is, I had no idea.

  28. It’s so good to be home, reading my fav blogs again. You never disappoint;).

    So. What kinda phone?
    (I got me a new iPhone whilst on holiday…woot)

  29. bluetooth? will you be one of those odd guys with that ballpoint pen like thing stuck on your ear, muttering for all eternity?

    that’s a very nice camera. you should be able to take lots of great belle pix with that.

  30. G’day WT, Happy belated birthday, I have a couple of Finepix cameras and I, was pretty happy with them… until I read the specs of your new toy, 18 X optical Zoom , focus to 2CM, shots with and without flash…. and so it goes.
    If you run into trouble with your dongle let me know I’m experienced with dongle dangle.

  31. Happy Birthday!! I’m younger than you and I don’t know what the hell a dongle is and wouldn’t know how to connect one even with all the illustrated directions in the world!! That’s why I have teenagers; they can figure out anything!!

  32. Oh, and I HATE bluetooth!! People with Blutetooth gadgets look like schizophrenics off their medication!!!

  33. Happy Birthday WT!! Glad you had “fun” on the coast and love your new camera!! Which phone did you get?? I just got a new one with a keyboard which I love!

  34. I was going to look at the camera specs but I got distracted by your dongle.
    I’m thinking of getting a Nikon DSLR soon. Not sure which model yet – depends on how the bank balance is going!

  35. *looking around confusedly*

    OK. I still don’t know what a dongle is, but as it sounds like a noun (a naughty noun at that) I would put it in the FIRST dingle dangle spot. Unless of courses, you would LIKE to let your dongle dangle. I’m thinking your wife assisted you with your dangling … participles … while you were visiting this weekend.

    I’m all for the MarKnie blend, though I have no clue who they are.

    Glad you had such a booty-ful birthday. heh. (Dang. She lives way over there? It must be like going shopping at Costco. You just stock up while you’re there. And when you get low again, you hop in the car and do it all over again.)

  36. 30 minutes of gridlock from an ACCIDENT? sheesh, I’m jealous. We have 45-60 minutes of gridlock every afternoon just ‘for fun.’ If there’s an accident then it gets bad.

  37. Wow! You bought ALL those cameras pictured on that page? I’m impressed.
    As you know, things are a wee bit crazy here and I’ll be honest, I didn’t read your whole post.
    Just scanned enough to see that you and Dirty Aunt Marnie probably won’t be getting married any time soon.
    I’m off on my broom again.
    See you in the funny papers, mafriend.

  38. Quit playing with your dongle and put up a new post for Christsakes!!!!!

  39. Hear hear … too much plurkin’ and fiddling with your dongle …. take some pictures with the new camera and let’s see them!!

  40. Hi ya WT! Happy Birthday! And you ain’t an old fart because I just realized that I am older than you! You young thang! you were only born in 1954.

    I hate new technology because just when I get used to something, hubby buys me a new upgraded one. I am learning my way around my ipod, but I’m still not sure what I need one for other than to sing along with my Elvis tunes whilst doing the hoovering.

    Now you say there is something out there called a “dongle”? Oh, I don’t even want to go there!

  41. Geez, I certainly hope you have not been playing with your dongle while plurking! For god sake man! You have now exceeded you blog neglection period! Post, something or I will have to give you an award or something! Hmmm I have just the thing in mind! he he he!

    Equoni: He is plurking! Whats your bloody excuse woman???? Say something!

  42. Hey HappyBirthday a little Belated!! QuickQuestion for you…..what are your thoughts on Windows Vista???? I am annoyed at the moment as I’ve just found out that it is NOT Vista at all that is causing the problem … this time…. it is my brand new hard drive CRASHED. Crap!! Since I don’t do Plurk very well, hope you’ll get this!

  43. For someone who doesn’t post alot YOU sure get a lot of comments.

  44. My mind totally went to the gutter about your dongle. Sorry. Is that really what they are called? Jeez, that’s a funny name. Glad you had a safe trip and were not in that accident!!!

  45. Where are you? Have you left us again?

  46. yeah, so, are you going to post anything else??

  47. has plurk eaten your brain?

  48. Ummm. It’s been just about two weeks since you last posted. You dead? If so. You should post about it you know.

  49. Long time no see WT. As good as ever too! Look forward to seeing the photos once you get around to unhanding your dongle 😉

  50. Well, hell – marknie get all engaged and you have a birthday? AMAZING. Yeah, I had one, too. A biggie.

    Funny, I always thought you were older than my husband, not a year younger.

    And somehow, I knew you were a Virgo. A CUSPY one, at that!

  51. Did the dogs eat your dongle? Or just the instruction book for your new camera? Looking forward to new pics!

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